My personal interest in the notion of polyamory came about through a culmination of various life events.  I have never been inclined towards exclusivity within any form of relationship, whether that relationship was with a friend or a lover.  However, due to the fact that my then-partner did not feel comfortable with the idea of non-exclusivity and coupled with my lack of awareness that anyone else felt like me, I chose to live a monogamous lifestyle.  After eight years, a lot of tears, frustration, and guilt on my part for feeling something that was “wrong”, my partner and I split up.

It was at this time that I ran across the concept of polyamory.  I was watching the TV program Sexcetera and found myself almost sagging with relief.  I wasn’t alone!  From that point forward I made it my mission to find out about this new way of living, and quickly came to realize that it was as old as the hills – indeed, it had just never had one concrete name (Veaux, 2009).  Non-monogamous life, or ‘polyamorous’ living (a term coined by Morning Glory Zell-Ravenheart in her 1990 article ‘A Bouquet of Lovers: Strategies for Responsible Open Relationships’) would two years later become ‘polyamory’.  This joining of the two Latin and Greek terms to produce a new English word – its literal translation being ‘many loves’ – was first used by the creator of the Usenet group alt.polyamory, Jennifer Wesp (Taormino, 2008, UK Polyamory, 2010).  This was what I had been looking for all along.  There was nothing wrong with me after all and not only that but I was not alone.

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